Is this Love?

This week we discussed many factors of dating and finding an eternal partner. The concept that stood out to me most was the 3 P's of dating. They are Planned, Paid for, and Paired off. These are super important for dating and finding the one that you can spend eternity with. We related these P's to the 3 P's in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, which are Preside, Provide, Protect. When the man plans a date it can be related to presiding over the family and having plans for the future which is so important to a family. A date being paid for shows signs that he can provide. It doesn't meant that he always will, but it is a sign and if he is consistently providing for you then that will most likely continue on in the marriage. Paired off gives the guys a reason to protect that girl for the date. It shows that they are loyal to each other for that date and that he is there to watch over and protect her.
If these 3 P's are consistently happening while dating, they will most likely carry on through the marriage.

The next concept that we talked about was the "Kno- Quo"
These are things that you should do while looking to marry someone. The three T's are, Togetherness, Talk, and Time. You wont truly know somebody without doing all three of these things, and even then you may not know them completely, but you will be able to know more than you would without the three T's. It is so important to spend time together because that is one of the best ways that you will get to know them. While spending time with them, you should make conversation and talk about things that will be important to you personally and to both of you in the marriage. When things are talked about before getting married, it is a great way to avoid hard things later that may come up. Time goes along with both Togetherness and Talking. Love is shown through time and it means a lot when someone takes the time to hang out with you or talk to you. These are greats ways to really get to know somebody and will help you decide if they are the one that you can spend your life with through the eternities.

“Soul mates' are fiction and an illusion; and while every young man and young woman will seek with all diligence and prayerfulness to find a mate with whom life can be most compatible and beautiful, yet it is certain that almost any good man and any good woman can have happiness and a successful marriage if both are willing to pay the price.” 
― Spencer W. Kimball

“How sweet is the assurance, how comforting is the peace that come from the knowledge that if we marry right and live right, our relationship will continue, notwithstanding the certainty of death and the passage of time. Men may write love songs and sing them. They may yearn and hope and dream. But all of this will be only a romantic longing unless there is an exercise of authority that transcends the powers of time and death.” 
― Gordon B. Hinckley

Gender Matters

When I think about Gender Roles, I think about what it states in The Family: A Proclamation to the World. It states, "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children." Even though there are these roles for mothers and fathers, I do believe that there are duties in the roles that the other gender may help out with. For example, there are times that the mother needs to go to work and the father stay home with the children. I don't think that this should be the first option, but there are times that the duties in parenting can be compromised. This is fine as long as both roles are being fulfilled.

When I think about myself growing up, I know that I was a tomboy. I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that my older brother and I are 14 months apart and did everything together. I loved playing sports, playing video games with him, and looked forward to hanging out with him and his friends. I grew out of the tomboy phase, but there are times that I feel like it is so much easier to get along with the guys and do the things that they do. Being an older sister for my younger sisters, I have been more girly, and I have been able to understand more about the importance of my role as a woman. I cannot wait to be a mother and nurture my children. I know that we are all the gender that we are for a reason and that our Father in Heaven has a plan for each one of us. 

I am proud to be a woman!

Cultures.. Valid? Equal? Both?

This week we have been discussing our beliefs about cultures being valid and equal. I realized that after discussing and seeing more points of view, I don't believe what I used to. I used to think that because people are equal, that cultures are equal as well. I thought that even though cultures are different they are equal and valid. There are so many different things that make up cultures, they can't all be equal. It depends on what aspect you you refer to, but the one I would like to mention is education. There are many cultures that have better options and resources for education. Therefore, not all cultures are equal.

Validity...
Even though there are so many cultures that do things differently than others, they are all valid. Everyone has their own way of doing things. If one thinks that something is great, another may not see it like that. Everyone is different and does things for different reasons. When we take the time to understand more of why people do the things they do, it makes it easier to not judge. Even though it is not right, it is natural to judge and categorize people. The best part is that, in the end, it will ultimately be up to Heavenly Father to judge.

Do I have the right motives?

This week in our class we talked about Family Theories. It was super interesting to learn about the theories and relate them to my own life. After a lot of good changes, my family has been able to achieve a better systems theory. It has been cool to see everyone understand their role in the family and how much it influences the happiness in our home. When we are all fulfilling our part, it makes things run a lot smoother.

While we were talking about the the exchange theory, I thought a lot about how I used to be one of those people that always paid attention to whether I was receiving something in return. I found that a lot of the times, I wasn't happy. Even if I didn't think that I was doing things for the wrong motive (expecting something back), I was. I would bring up times that I did things for people and received nothing in return. I would think that I was always helping others and it was worthless. When I realized how selfish this was, I was heart broken. I really was. I had missed out on so many opportunities to serve those around me because I was too worried that I wouldn't receive anything in return. I have been able to work on this, and it has made serving a lot more fun and worthwhile. I absolutely love serving those around me just because. I know that we are all God's children and that He works through us. We need to make sure that we are willing and able to fulfill assignments that He wants us to accomplish. Being in the exchange theory is not the way to do this. We should simply do things for people because it is the right thing to do, not because we will receive something in return. I can say that, my motives are more clear and it makes life a lot easier and happier!